Why are you so stupid?

You know what really pisses me off? Stupid people. And I am not talking about those who occasionally have a brain lapse and do something stupid...no no no. I am talking about people who thrive in their stupidity. These people have as much stupidity as I have blood. If stupidity were a currency, they'd be billionaires. I think you get my point. There are times where I feel like God put these people on Earth just to piss me off. They get in my way, talk their talk, and then argue to no end about their stance, only to annoy me and make me bow out in default. Want an example?

My bank made an error in their favor that cost me roughly $60. This made no sense to me, so I called up the customer support department, being that this is the only way to get an answer without listening to 20 different recordings all telling me how much they value my service and which button I should press to achieve nirvana. So this half-wit answers (How do I know she's a half-wit? Easy, she has a nice, thick Kentucky accent, that's how.) I calmly explain my quandary and ask that it be rectified immediately. I give out all my pertinent information she asked for, and I sat patiently as she fat-fingered my account number into the computer 3 times (I know she fat-fingered because no one hits 7 keys all at once without screwing something up...it was that loud..I heard them over the phone). Anyway, so she types in all this information and then says I overdrafted my account, not once, but twice, and they charged me $60 in fees. Here's the kicker...there isn't anything on my register or transaction log that shows where these could have originated from. I put just enough money in this account to pay bills, and no more. There should have been about $17 left in this account. All my transactions added up correctly, and the total balance was $16.74. I mention all this to her, once again in a nice, friendly tone. She then goes on about how I had two debits, one for $21.20 and one for $1.00 in that overdrafted my account. I asked who they were from, a little annoyed now because who the hell debited my account without my authorization? She stated that these were from Verizon Wireless. Ah, the cell phone company. But what the hell, they got their money for my bill 2 weeks ago, what's this? At this point I am logging onto my online banking page to see, in detail, what they debited. I log onto the page, and there aren't any debits listed. I ask her to verify her information, and then to make sure she was looking at my account. She states everything correctly, but these two debits do not exist on my account. I am getting a little steamed at this point because she's just typing away, telling me I owed them this money and that there is nothing that they can do to help me out. I ask her why these aren't showing up on my account, and she says its because Verizon cancelled these debits before they posted to the account.

Great, so I shouldn't have overdraft charges then, right? Wrong. She claims that my account still overdrafted. I ask her to prove it. I told her to add up all that was on there and then subtract it from my beginning balance and tell me what she gets. What was her answer? $16.74. What did she say then? "Well, then when you factor in the $60 in fees, its -$43.26. WHAT?!?! DID YOU JUST SAY THAT?!?!?! YOU JUST TOLD ME MY ACCOUNT WAS IN THE POSITIVE, YET YOU STILL ADD IN THE OVERDRAFT CHARGES?!?!?! DOES THIS NOT MAKE ANY SENSE TO YOU?!?!? DID YOU TAKE MATH IN SCHOOL?!?!?! She gets upset (and rightfully so) and tells me I need to speak with her manager. "Good, I was beginning to actually feel my IQ slip below 140 during this conversation," I so eloquently stated. I heard her sigh as she put me on hold. Ah the power of being an asshole.

So the manager gets on, tells me that I have upset his employee, to which sent me into another tirade that basically left him breathless and without any cocky/witty comeback. He asked me to tell him what was wrong, I explained, and wouldn't you know it, he credited my account for the 2 erroneous fees, and issued a stern warning of "Next time you call, try to be a little courteous to our staff as they are only trying to help. If not, we could be forced to close your account." I scoffed at his warning and told him, "Do something stupid like this again and I will not only close my account for you, but I'll see your asses in court for incompetence, harassment, failure to provide service, and theft," and quickly hung up the phone. Ah, the fun I have in my life with stupid people....what bliss. And all this on a Friday. Oh what fun will the weekend bring?